the blog is back

i have probably said this before but it is for real this time.  i am back.  2018 really sucked big time but it is past and 2019 is going to be fucking awesome.  i dont want to go back over 2018.  terrible things happened and we will leave it at that.

one good thing (besides the west coast eagles winning the premiership) was that I actually did a triathlon.  western australia 70.3.  i was meant to do the full but the training (or lack of) and  probably the body issues would not have made that a great idea.  the 70.3 was hard enough. first triathlon of any distance in 2.5 years.  time goes by before you know it.

so a quick race report.  enjoyed my stay down in busselton.  it was great to be back and i loved getting away.  the weather was excellent.  i love the shark net down the foreshore. 

the lead up prior was a bit stressful as i had problems with the bitch bike.  i have never bonded with this bike.  the head set went again and the part wasnt going to arrive in time so i just had to put up with that.  but it was a problem when one of the bolts holding the tri bars on snapped.  luckily my bike guy was pretty crafty and managed to bolt something together and it held on.

race morning was so fucking early.  we set off before the 140.6 so race start was 5.30 am.  that meant getting up at 3.30 am.  set up my gear next to my bike and not a great deal of room.  headed off to the bag drop off after putting my wetsuit on. i felt pretty good and not as nervous as in the past.  

one thing that they have changed about this race and is so disappointing and sad is the swim course.  due to the fear of sharks we no longer swim around the jetty.  there is no mass swim start and the unfortunate 140.6 folks have to do two laps of the course.  i felt great right from the beginning.  it was the same when i did my couple of practice swims.  very strange as right from the get go i just swam without any stops and starts.  i was breathing well and it was bilateral and every 3/1.  i was relaxed and no anxiety.   i felt quicker than my actual time but from what i hear the course was long so i am not as disappointed. 

my transitions were pretty quick.  for me anyway.  straight out on the bike.  this was just a hard slog.  never a tailwind or a headwind.  just crosswinds the whole day.  about half way in my hamstring and shoulder were extremely painful and i was very uncomfortable. i stopped and stretched and that helped.  i was very glad to get off that bike.  note to self to drink more.  so it was my slowest 70.3 bike leg (not including my punctures at mandurah) but also a very good effort considering.

when i got back to transition the selfish bitch next to me had racked her bike in my spot.  for fucks sake this is just rude and extremely inconsiderate.  i had to drop my bike, move hers and then put my bike in the correct spot.  my gear had been moved.  the worst part is that while she did finish second she was a long way off first.  she is also in my triathlon club so it would be very awkward if i lodged a complaint.  and i wanted to as she will just do this to the next person. 

so now for the run.  i knew this was going to be ugly considering the lack of running during training.  it was slow and sometimes very hard but it just shows that past experience is worth a whole fucking lot. i ran - jogged really - when i was near all the main crowds and tried to keep it going between aid stations.   it actually got easier the closer i got to finishing and that is experience - again.  i did have one wish and that was to finish under 7 hours.  i wanted a clean record of just 6 plus hour finishes and i got my wish.  it actually wasnt my slowest.  that is still mandurah and that puncture and terrible run.   

so that was it.  i got my towel and my medal and it felt very, very good. i had another day in busselton so i relaxed, ate a really big burger and had a few beers.  

since then i have done the first of the five trail series races.  i have swam a few times and i have ridden the hills.  i have been busy deciding what i want to do this year.  since there is no triseries events things are a bit all over the shop.  i have signed up for the bunbury olympic distance in February.  i plan on doing karri valley in March.  i have the next trail series event this weekend.  i will probably do the sorrento Australia Day swim.  but the main event that i have signed up for, booked the flights and accommodation is Sunshine Coast 70.3 in september.  Here I come Mooloolaba !!!

And not to forget I need to find a JOB !!!  next on my list now the holidays are over.

the ironman myth

i have discussed this before.  the ironman myth. the crap about how it will change your life and you will never be the same again.  most experiences of any kind are going to change you in some way.

ironman will show you that you are physically capable of more than you thought.  you might even be surprised at how disciplined you can be when you want to be.  it may even amaze you how comfortable you become blowing your nose without a tissue, talking about bodily functions or the fact you now have a separate lycra wash to go with the whites.

so when my dad become ill and then passed away and at the same time i was also made redundant i figured no problem.  i have done 5 ironmans so i can handle anything.  my only DNF was my sixth attempt at ironman so surely that must have been character building.  i can handle anything.  but the truth is quite different.   you train yourself to swim, bike and run a bloody long way without stopping.  you dont train yourself to manage grief or stress.  ironman only showed me how to do an ironman.  it showed me how to be disciplined and how to persevere.  but only when things were good.  when things went south it never showed me how to stay focused and motivated.   i loved ironman but it wasnt enough to see me through the tough times.

i was hoping to do the last tri series event of the year but that never happened.  however what has happened is i am back swimming with squads.  a big thank you to my friend coby who convinced me it would be fine.  she had shattered her ankle eight months ago and was only just back swimming so we would be slow together.  i actually surprised myself at my first css session.  then i went running with cooper and really enjoyed it.  next up i did my hills ride and it didnt kill me and riding for nearly three hours was actually quite doable.  what i have struggled with is training two days in a row.  it seems i need a day to recover from each session.  and i am yet to try doing two sessions in one day.  long way to go but i have started.  i am excited though and i can feel my thin self coming back which not only feels great but is a mental relief.  i hate being chunky fat.

my goal right now is to train everyday this week and maybe, just maybe do three of each !

swissmurdie trail run

omg.  i finally turned up for an event and finished it.  it is a fucking miracle. i did change the distance from the longest to the shortest but who cares.  and i wasnt dead fucking last either.  close but i didnt get that award.  i did think i was going to throw up when i crossed the finish  line though.  that would have been embarrassing.

this trail run was awesome but very painful.  i am sure it only ever went up the mountain and we never came back down.  i can walk today but it is very painful after i havent moved for awhile.  but it feels great.  i am alive.  

i did the 7 km event.  it had 259m of elevation gain.  whatever that really means other than the graph looks awesome. it took me over an hour but keep in mind i havent run anywhere in months nor have i even walked the dog.  the greatest distance has been from the carpark to the beach and back.  maybe a short walk along the beach.  i am so out of practice i forgot to turn my garmin off when i finished.

so now i am all keen as mustard to sign up for more events but i have rules.  i can only enter if i train so i must leave the signing up to the very latest possible time and i will just have to suffer fomo.  i now have to get my legs back to normal as soon as possible.

live what you love

i have a new job.  thank fucking christ.

something has finally gone my way.  however on the training front i am still bloody inconsistent.

i was signed up for ironman australia but with work and the fact that i did not have a base to begin a 20 week programme the only smart thing to do was to transfer it to Busselton.  This was not an expensive exercise and while i was a little sad i really had no choice.  i left it too late to have a chance.

so what now ?  well i have to train.  simple as that.  i have plenty of time to get a base back before i begin to train for busso.  i am hoping i can do the last race for the TriSeries at Hillaries in April.  It will be my first triathlon in 18 months.   i have 41 weeks till busselton.

i swam in a grown up pool yesterday and i am little inspired.  i dont want to get carried away although  i am going back today.  i am reading my old books and updating my garmin account and trying to kick start all those previous habits.  i have set goals for the next two weeks.  i am going to try and use instagram to motivate me by posting a picture of my pathetic training everyday.  i must admit it felt good to be tired after the swim yesterday.  

i have to lose weight.  i am a fat porker and there is a limit to how far lycra will stretch.  it is embarrassing.  at the pool yesterday i did regret taking my ironman drink bottle.  i am sure people questioned my credentials once they saw chunky me and the snail pace i was swimming at.  if anything should inspire me it will be this. 

my daily motto is now to live what you love.  i feel like my life can now go back to being normal. all the stuff from the last few years is over.   you dont forget and there are things that will stay with me but it does get easier.   now i know from previous posts that i have been saying this for awhile now.  i was full of shit then.  hopefully i am no longer.