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Monday, April 16, 2018

the ironman myth


i have discussed this before.  the ironman myth. the crap about how it will change your life and you will never be the same again.  most experiences of any kind are going to change you in some way.

ironman will show you that you are physically capable of more than you thought.  you might even be surprised at how disciplined you can be when you want to be.  it may even amaze you how comfortable you become blowing your nose without a tissue, talking about bodily functions or the fact you now have a separate lycra wash to go with the whites.

so when my dad become ill and then passed away and at the same time i was also made redundant i figured no problem.  i have done 5 ironmans so i can handle anything.  my only DNF was my sixth attempt at ironman so surely that must have been character building.  i can handle anything.  but the truth is quite different.   you train yourself to swim, bike and run a bloody long way without stopping.  you dont train yourself to manage grief or stress.  ironman only showed me how to do an ironman.  it showed me how to be disciplined and how to persevere.  but only when things were good.  when things went south it never showed me how to stay focused and motivated.   i loved ironman but it wasnt enough to see me through the tough times.

i was hoping to do the last tri series event of the year but that never happened.  however what has happened is i am back swimming with squads.  a big thank you to my friend coby who convinced me it would be fine.  she had shattered her ankle eight months ago and was only just back swimming so we would be slow together.  i actually surprised myself at my first css session.  then i went running with cooper and really enjoyed it.  next up i did my hills ride and it didnt kill me and riding for nearly three hours was actually quite doable.  what i have struggled with is training two days in a row.  it seems i need a day to recover from each session.  and i am yet to try doing two sessions in one day.  long way to go but i have started.  i am excited though and i can feel my thin self coming back which not only feels great but is a mental relief.  i hate being chunky fat.

my goal right now is to train everyday this week and maybe, just maybe do three of each !